Reader Recommendations: (I will have) Nun of That

I was given “Nun of That” to watch a long time ago by one of our readers. Knowing absolutely nothing about this movie, I immediately jumped to the conclusion that this movie was going to be like Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter. It looked cheesy; there was a lot of ass kicking and strong Christianity tone. Knowing this is an obvious B-list movie, it automatically gets the tag for terrible movie, but the quality can swing both ways. Read my full details after the jump.

The Order of the Black Habit has been patrolling the Earth and punishing wrong doers for 1500 years. But lately they have been struggling to keep the mob under control. After observing Sister Kelly Wrath for many years, they found her struggle with her anger problems to be a benefit. They have elected her to be the leader of a group of elite nuns sent to destroy the mob once and for all. She is trained by no other than Moses, Gandhi and even Jesus himself to prepare her for the challenges that await her.

Sister Wrath doing some shootin'

Why was Ghandi even in this movie?! He seemed so out of place, but he was one of the funnier characters in this film. He was the one in charge of training Sister Wrath in martial arts, even though Ghandi was a peacemaker. Most of the sisters in the elite group were real fun to watch, and for some reason a lot of them had suppressed lesbian tendencies. Not exactly sure why, but it totally gave this movie more a b-list feel. So yes, there are boobs, girls making out with girls and sexual innuendos being tossed around like salad.

But besides all that ‘fun’ stuff, this movie does not have anything going for it. It tries to be funny, but I wasn’t laughing at the jokes. The action scenes take themselves seriously, but who else would. And the worst part is the terrible ‘special’ effects, and they are truly special. But here is the kicker, JC:VH had the same problems, but it had this weird charm to it that this movie lacks. It was mainly the long boring scenes in between anything interesting. The deep emotional scenes that were trying to build a story were terrible and just ruined the mood for me.

Our lord and savoir, Jesus Christ.

But that wasn’t the only bad thing; every cliché was in this movie. My friend/editor and I were literally pointing out cliché’s throughout the movie seconds before they came out. So to tell you that this movie is predictable is an understatement. And most importantly there was no cheese factor in this movie.

I cannot believe I am going to say this, but I hated a movie with numerous of lesbian scenes. I know I am coming off as a perv, but there is nothing more beautiful than two girls making out. But besides that, I had no fun in watching this movie. I was laughing, but at all the jokes we were making about how bad this movie is. I really wanted to like this movie, but I couldn’t and it did not help I have been watching good movies lately.