Hercules in New York

I did finally get a copy of “Hercules in New York”, which was good news. Bad news was when I saw the IMDB rating for this movie, 2.8/10. But this is Mr. Universes first movie, so it has to be a must watch for this month. I automatically gave this the Puneet’s Terrible Movie tag for the obvious b-list feel of the movie. But more details after the jump.

Here I would normally summarize the story for you folks, but here bring the first problem. There is no actual story; the movie has no direction. Hercules falls from Mt. Olympus after a disagreement with Zeus. Where he is picked up by some fisherman who don’t understand where he came from. Thereafter, the fisherman tries to treat Hercules like any other mortal; this angers Hercules and beats up the crew. He is picked up by a local and is shown around New York. He falls for the daughter of the head of a university and their relationship grows, I think.

I have to start off by saying there is absolutely no redeeming factors in this movie. The acting is terrible, there is no story and the script feels dull. I was trying to find some fun in this movie, but there is nothing. But these side characters mean nothing when we have a very young and buff Arnold. But he sucks too; it is not entertaining to watch Arnie. He has no facial expression, even more bland than usual and he has no funny pun filled lines.

Those guns!

The most memorable part of this movie is when Arnie is on a date with his new girlfriend at Grand Central Park. The scene flips from night to day every so often, which made this really hard to watch. But to top it off, he fights a bear that is loose. An amusing part is that the bear is so obviously a man in a bear suit, it just felt like Arnie was beating up a man in a bear costume (slightly awesome idea).

On a side note, Arnies voice was originally dubbed over by a voice actor, the DVD I got had an audio track where Arnie reread the script. This brings up a question in my mind; his accent is so thick, it would have been easier to understand with the voice actor.

To summarize, I don’t think anyone should ever watch this movie for its ‘quality’. Only if you want to say you’ve seen/survived Arnie’s first movie should you even think about watching it. But I’ll assure you it will be a hard movie to watch. Scenes drag on, story tires to be important but fail and there is no cheesy parts for you to laugh at.